Five Rules to Help You Keep Your Soul in November

1. Candy is not breakfast. 

Hand-picked for the Senate by the PM

2. If you're growing a moustache but doing nothing for charity, you're a Grade 11 hockey player. Congrats, A-hole.

3. Christmas is in late December. You're not Wal-Mart. Have some class and shaddup about it for at LEAST a month. You're making it impossible for those of us trying to find a reason not to hate it.

4. Of the major holidays/events of October through December, Remembrance Day is the most important. (Then Grey Cup, this year only). Show some respect for the only one of these not whored-over by capitalism, wouldja?

5. Winter is going to happen now. Go outside and enjoy it because it's awesome.